In my experience working with thousands of couples on financial matters, I have found that true partnership in managing personal finances is a rarity. Most couples struggle with differing levels of aptitude, education, interest, and natural talent when it come to money management. This imbalance often shapes how financial decisions and responsibilities are divided within the relationship.
Over time, this division creates detrimental power dynamics that hinder partnership. Typically, the partner with more financial knowledge assumes the burden of making decisions, which can lead to feelings of anxiety and responsibility for the couple’s financial well-being. Conversely, the partner with less financial literacy may feel that their needs and desires are dismissed, even before they are voiced.
While assigning financial roles can streamline day-to-day money management, it often fails to ensure that both partners fell heard and supported. To cultivate a more balanced partnership, it is essential that both individuals are actively involved in conversations and decisions about finances. This requires open communication and a willingness to engage with each other’s perspectives, ensuring that both partners feel valued and secure in their relationship.
Creating Balance
At The Prosperity People, we have crafted our financial planning process which builds a strong foundation for a thriving financial partnership. Our approach encompasses all the essential steps such as goal setting and modeling. However, what truly sets our process apart are three important elements designed to bring balance to your relationship with money:
Personal Prosperity Intention Statements:
Each partner begins by writing and sharing their own personal prosperity intention statement. This exercise encourages self-reflection and clarity about individual desires.
Separate Goal Development:
Unlike typical advice that encourages couples to merge their goals, we advocate for each partner to develop their goals independently. This approach fosters individual accountability and voice.
Judgement-Free Collaboration:
Before diving into the financial plan, the couple agrees to honor each individual’s goals without judgement. And if this feels impossible, to keep their judgement to themselves. This commitment ensures that both partners feel respected and valued as they work together to achieve as many of their aspirations as possible.
By implementing these principles, we aim to nurture a supportive partnership where financial discussions become empowering rather than divisive.
What makes these three elements powerful?
The Power of Intention:
Financial goals are bests built on a solid foundation of intention or purpose. In a world with countless choices, you often can achieve most of the goals you dream of, but not all of them. However, knowing your “why” can help you sift through and identify what is truly important for you. Your prosperity intention statement establishes a meaningful frame for sorting and filtering your choices. It also serves to inform your partner about what is important to you.
Setting Goals Individually:
Before embarking on financial planning, it is common for the more financially savvy partner to take the lead. However, to truly meet both partners’ needs, it is vital to break this dynamic. Couples should set their goals separately before coming together. This approach ensures that every voice is heard, particularly those who may have been quieter in past discussions.
When each partner prepares their goals independently, it fosters a more inclusive environment for subsequent conversations. When the couple comes together to share their goals, set a safe space ground rule. Let go of judgement and engage curiosity.
Invite the partner who is typically more passive about money to share their goals first. Next ask the partner who is more involved day-to-day with money to share their goals. This practice honors each person’s perspective and expertise.
Creating a Safe Space for Open Discussion:
True partnership thrives on compromise, but often, those compromises are made silently. One partner may hesitate to express their needs due to fear of judgement-whether that fear is real or imagined. Addressing this concern is essential for maintaining balance in the relationship.
To create a supportive atmosphere, it is important to establish ground rules for discussion. Both partners should agree that the goal of financial planning is to ensure everyone’s needs are met. By agreeing to honor each other’s goals with judgement beforehand, you create a safe space and shift the power dynamic. This empowers both partners to openly share their truths.
Conclusion: Strengthening Bonds Through Financial Alignment
In summary, navigating the complexities of money within a partnership requires intention, individual goal setting, and a commitment to non-judgement. By following these principles, couples can transform financial discussions from sources of tension to opportunities for growht and unity. When love and money are approached with openness and respect, relationships can flourish, bringing fulfillment and success in all areas of life.
See Yourself in this Conversation and Need Help?
Are you ready for an open and collaborative relationship with money in your partnership or marriage? Would you like to shift your money dynamics as a couple? If so, The Prosperity People would like to help. Reach out to us at Lisa@TheProsperityPeople.com or 859-331-7755